Despite being with my wife for nearly half my life, I’ve never had penetrative sex. It was originally because my wife has severe anxiety about things going inside her, but to be honest there’s some hesitancy from me now as well. I’ve gotten very used to how we have sex and it doesn’t involve penetration.

We have a partner now and I think it’s something that they’d be open to, but I’m actually pretty nervous about the whole thing.

My desires were always fairly unconventional but the way my wife’s and my sex life has developed has really reinforced that. My wife is essentially 100% top at this point. They have no real interest in reciprocation. They’re on the ace spectrum so their enjoyment is different. Every once in a blue moon they’ll ask for something but it generally doesn’t end with them orgasming. All of that to say my main contribution to my sex life has just been becoming enjoyable to watch. I’m usually very vocal and squirmy. I whimper, beg, plead, cry, scream, etc. lol.

It was somewhat validating that one of the first times the three of us had sex together our new partner said they loved what I was doing and that it was definitely turning them on. I felt a lot of pressure to reciprocate for my wife for so long because I didn’t want to be one of those lazy partners who doesn’t do anything, but that’s sort of what my wife wants out of it. Letting go of that was difficult for me. So actually hearing from someone else tell me that what I’m doing is actually enjoyable meant a lot. Not that I ever doubted my wife, but, you know how things are. Like when a stranger compliments your outfit as opposed to someone you know well.

So, that would be the “confession”. I’d never describe myself as a virgin, but I’ve definitely never had traditional sex.

My wife and I opened our marriage to a third a few months ago. They’ve been living with us temporarily while they look for an apartment in the area. We have threesomes pretty regularly. It’s pretty amazing right now.

Like many people with ADHD my interests change every few weeks/months… I’ve been saying my technical muse left and my erotic muse has returned. I’ve began doing a few erotic roleplays online again. I got really into this hobby about a year ago but stopped around the time I got a job. (I had a lot of free time for a few months lol.) It’s been fun!

I’m really trying to pace myself. I took on way too many partners last time. At times I had maybe a dozen going at once. I got caught in this loop where when I was done writing replies and I wanted to keep writing I’d look for new partners. Over time the hobby stopped being something fun and became an obligation I dreaded doing. So I stopped. I’m trying to avoid that this time. Only take on maybe three maximum at a time. If even.

This has been something I’ve been interested in and actually why I logged into this account today. I’ve gotten back into text erotic roleplay a little but the only places I could ever find enough people interested in this is on Discord servers and on Twitter. When I check the #nsfwrp hashtag on Mastodon I see a handful of posts from a handful of users, but it’s not really at any sort of critical mass to be able to find folks (unless you and one of the few people doing it end up being a good match).

I don’t think labels are terribly important for anything other than making communication easier. That said, watching and being humiliated definitely feels like what most would call cuckoldry. But by other definitions, you might not be called a cuckold because you’re actively engaged in a sexual activity (regardless of context). Sometimes people use the term to just mean not being involved at all, like if your wife was cheating on you.

It doesn’t really matter what you call yourself here. It’s not like if what you are doing is technically cuckoldry if that suddenly means it is wrong. As long as everyone is consenting and enjoying themselves it doesn’t matter.

All that said, I think most people would call this cuckoldry lol.

I’m not subscribed to that community. It’s not my thing. I’m not into Loli either. Frankly, I do see a problem with Loli. I guess to me it is because the Loli “excuse” of “she’s actually 3000 years old but just looks like a child” but then they proceed to portray them exactly as someone would portray a child. They (generally, I’m sure someone has counter examples) don’t portray them as some wizened elderly woman in a child’s body. That’s why Loli generally feels disgusting to me.

Age verification is the correct thing to do. In the broader internet where things are less strict I’m sure you can find actual underage actors (who are possibly even being trafficked) where it could be avoided with proper age verification. Frankly I think that’s just a super important thing (even apart from this specific discussion). An assumption I’m making (and I guess everyone is) is that the admins’ age verification is adequate. So, assuming it is, I don’t see a problem with allowing creators who appear young to make NSFW content of themselves. If it’s not adequate then there’s a much more important discussion that needs to be had. Based on some of the sticky posts over the past few weeks it seems like they’re serious about it.

To your point, a lot of content makes my skin crawl. I just ignore it. If there’s any I think is actually illegal I’d report it. Maybe I haven’t seen the specific ones you’re talking about so maybe that’s why I don’t feel the same way. I briefly went to the community when I heard about this and just now to see what the fuss was and it just seemed like legal but youthful looking people. Or just folks in their mid twenties just trying to look cute or wholesome. I didn’t see anything that makes me feel the need to report anything as CSAM. That’s just me. I believe you should report content you think is CSAM, I’m not trying to say you shouldn’t.

I know I said it before but I really do view this whole thing similar to folks who may not understand forms of kink are consensual. It’s not a one-to-one thing, but it is similar. Seeing a consensual rape-play session may make people question what the fuck is happening and may make their skin crawl. But if everyone is consenting then it’s fine. I understand why people would have a hard time accepting that (especially if they themselves have been abused).

Why do you care if an 18+ year old who looks youthful does NSFW stuff? Take an extreme example, what if Hasbulla did nudes? He is 21 but looks extremely young. I can’t see how telling him he isn’t allowed to make nude content because of his appearance is anything other than ableist and body shaming. You don’t have to like the content or even like the people who would look at it to think the content is acceptable.

If everyone is a consenting adult then everything is fine.

I believe their argument is that the community is a gathering place for stuff that looks like CSAM as opposed to any of the content looking like CSAM or not. I’m not agreeing or disagreeing, but it’s important to represent people’s arguments correctly.

I think folks forget just how young people in their early 20s can look.

I think your goof was the “I can’t be held accountable for your mistake of fact”. I believe they’re clearly the one in the wrong regardless though.

It sucks but it is what it is.

I think it’s been an interesting debate. You both make good points. Ads about how “it’s similar to Loli in that it is trying to look underaged” and you with “we don’t discriminate against youthful looking adults”.

I guess I see it like DDLG kinks. I find it gross. I can see why people would want to ban it because they say they’re pretending to do something illegal like CSAM, but a lot of links pretend to do something illegal. BDSM pretends to tie people up and torture them but people don’t look at it and say “hey, you’re intentionally trying to look like you’re torturing people against their wills”.

People seem to have a gut reaction to illegal things with children moreso than illegal things with adults and I guess that’s why some people have this reaction to wanting to “purge” communities like that as opposed to ones that do things like CNC, BDSM, etc. But hey, as long as everyone involved is an adult and consenting that’s totally fine.

You’ve heard of sounding, now get ready for literal flamin’ hot blow jobs.